So I returned home from 3 days of wonderful Ayurvedic treatments to find Elijah weaned. Just like that. No drama. No tears. Nothing. All that questioning I did about breastfeeding or not breastfeeding and it was done just like that.
Admittedly the first thing he said at the airport upon seeing me was "nooners", his word for Mama's milk, before showing greater interest in the "Welcome to Guernsey" booklets than at me at all!
Back home a little while later he asked again and I told him that I thought Mama's milk would not taste quite the same after Mama's treatments and he lay down to feed but must have got a sense that something had changed, or maybe I smelt different, or maybe he just decided, "nah, I'm done with this", because all of a sudden he moved away from me, no drama, no milk.
And that was that. I put him to bed that night without feeding him to sleep easy peasy. And he slept through until 3.30am, which is unheard of. In fact the silly thing is I kept waking up waiting to hear him cry for me!
Things are a changing. And gently too. As I always intended. Just not in the way I intended. But isn't that always the case! Note to self - remember to get out of your own way, stop being the obstacle. Ha! Funny really that I should have found myself practicing a whole 2 hour yoga session in honour of Ganesha with Stewart Gilchirst only a few or so ago now, see there is some benefit in sweating and surrendering in front of this deity (not that one realises it at the time!).
That Ayurveda is truly wonderful. I can highly recommend it. I thoroughly enjoyed all 9 hours of delicious treatments with all manner of oils and pastes in a wonderfully warm and womb-like room with gentle and ambient music played in the background so that I feel clean on the inside and out and with renewed energy and clarity. And a happy weaned son!
To me, Ayurveda is truly inspiring, the most ancient and authentically recorded health system in history, over 5,000 years old, it was created by yogis who spent their lives studying nature and the human condition.
Meaning “the science of life” it is exactly that, viewing health in four dimensions of physical, sensory, mental and spiritual and is centred on preventative medicine and bringing a person back to balance. It shows how an imbalance in one part of a person’s being will affect them in another, i.e. if a person isn’t being true to their life path (dharma) then physical and mental illnesses can arise which cannot be effectively treated with modern medicines but can be helped by Ayurveda.
Ayurveda uses elemental medicine which means that they balance out earth, fire, water, air and ether in the body. These are divided into three doshas, Vata, Pitta and Kapha, which are the basis of a person’s constitution and also the factors that can create imbalances.
Ayurveda places great emphasis on diet, lifestyle, yoga, meditation, massage and herbal medicines to bring a person back to health and keep them there - and health, to quote from the Ayurvedic Health Home in Kathmandu, Nepal (where I stayed many years ago now) is “a dynamic process, an inner joyfulness, like a flow of the river or a breeze of the wind.
Dr Deepika was recommended to me about 10 years ago now from a London-based friend I met on a yoga retreat in Bali and I have seen her a number of times ever since. I usually know when I need to see her because life has lost its flow or I am feeling a little out of sorts and usually my pitta gets deranged so that I start really pushing myself and getting angry and my skin isn't great and the thoughts are all consuming!
I have been feeling like this for a good old while, perhaps not surprising off the back of the IVF drugs, but also on some level, I suspect I was probably just exhausted by the feeding and also feeling a pressure to stop and angry at my inability to make a decision about it...the body has been trying to tell me for some time, but one can be ever so stubborn an caught in one's mind!!
Still we get where we need to be, even if we do make it a whole heap more challenging for ourselves in the process. And actually that is where Elijah is by far my greatest teacher, so much wiser than me, because he decided he wants to stop feeding and that's it, done and dusted...whereas I have been thinking about it way too much and giving it far too much energy and holding on to it...aren't children just amazing the way they just move on..."move on Mama", I can hear him say.
I am so grateful to Dr Deepika for sharing her gift, she certainly helps me (and others I know!) to keep our feet on the ground. And to Elijah for making me laugh at myself and my ridiculous resistance to change - despite praying for it (and more sleep in a gentle manner, no crying it out for us) on the other hand! It seems that grace works in ways beyond our control (and ability to control the process to reach an outcome), we are our own obstacle hey, thank you then Ganesha, Remover of all Obstacles. Ha!!
Love and gratitude!