It has been some time since I have written here. Some of you may already know that I have come down with a bout of glandular fever again. Basically I have 'burnt' myself out from all the teaching and energy work I have been doing since I returned to Guernsey in August 2009.

Apparently it is not unusual when you work within the healing world to give a little too much of yourself and to reach this point where your own energy reserves become very low and the adrenal glands are under a huge amount of stress. Needless to say this throws the balance of the whole endocrine system and hence the glands play up again and you feel as if you have no energy.

It is not ideal, obviously, it has been some time since I have been ill and while the mind still wants to be active, the body says otherwise. The body is of course the source of all wisdom...and sometimes it has to take drastic action to get our attention.

Of course this whole process has had an effect on my mood so that I have been up and down, one minute hyper and the other quite depressed. I am familiar with the depression, I used to suffer with this many years ago and this is what led me to Yoga and indeed Reiki in the first place. For me, and for others maybe (I can only talk from my own experience), I believe that depression arises when my soul is unable to express itself, like a yearning, and I feel that the world has closed in and with this comes the darkness and the despair...it is a wake up call that things have to change.

One of my friends set me this wonderful poem by Rumi (see below), which talks a little about this - in terms of welcoming the depression, like any other state, for often it has come to show you a new and potentially more joyous way of being...he is inspired, truly.

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.

Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

-- Jelaluddin Rumi,
translation by Coleman Barks

I 'get' this poem, for me time is now slowing down and I am starting to once again "smell the roses" as change happens seemingly naturally.

Ewan and I have a kestrel nesting in the quarry at the back of the garden and we are learning a lot from watching him...so graceful and agile, intuitive and patient, waiting for just the right moment...I am also finding the time to help Ewan in the garden, gentle of course, but ever so healing. We have been swimming in the sea too, very cleansing and grounding, and he is teaching me the names of the trees and flowers, which are so abundant at the moment - I am delighted to see that the honey suckle is making an appearance again. I am also able to chat and laugh with my friends and my family again, something I have not had the time to do for months. So you see, everything happens for a reason.

I am completely indebted to Ross and Star for covering my Yoga classes for me - I know as you may know that there is no such thing as a coincidence, and them being here right now was clearly meant to be. I am also indebted to Sheila and Hayley for taking on a lot of my private work, Yoga and Reiki.

And I am thankful to everyone else, the many earthly angels out there, who have helped and continue to help, and for the Divine, the angels, the Mother Goddess and the incredible workings and mystery of this Universe.

xxx

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